This Will Be Strangest Post...but Please Give Me A Chance

[Far~From~heaven]

Hey! I am 17 year old who is rather mature for her age. But when I was 13, in an act of desperation over facial hair of the upper lip, I...shaved it off. I used to wax is all the time, but it hurt so much that when my mom went on a trip leaving me to the waxing, i just started shaving and couldn't stop. now the hair is gone and i pluck it off, but it looks like a man...i look like a baboon! I always had trouble with my sub-par looks, but now I feel as if I should accept my life as a girl who will not get anyone to my standards (good job, respectful, smart, etc). Sadly, I feel, because of my looks, that I don't deserve anyone. I feel as if I should just end my future pain. Every guy that I would love to be with would vomit at the sight of me.



Also, I have trouble being in public. I feel as if everyone one's eyes are on my face; they glance quickly in shock over the darkned upper lip patch over my Indian skin (light brown). My life is pretty much set as a work and die situation. I have nothing but my brain because no guy, with whom I would like (not so much looks, but in intelligence) to have a relationship, will pay any regard.



So guys, chicks, what do you think? Should I order the cyanide pills or continue to live a life where every breath, every addictive glance in the mirror feels like a thousand knives piercing my heart.

[maya]

Hey girl,

I know what its like to have a dark upper lip too...when i was thirteen i tried shaving it and now its thicker, and i tried bleaching (bad idea - unless you have really light skin it bleaches your skin too! maybe i did it wrong though). I thought everyone was looking. If I was talking to a guy I was self-conscious because i thought he'd probably notice. I thought maybe my body was abnormal; i didnt notice this on other girls. I feel like mine is like a man's too but really it isnt. Its just way thicker than most girls'. But there's a lot of us like that. I had a boyfriend who liked it. One time his friend said "Hey you've got a mustache" and then I'm sure i gave him a pained look and he said "No it's kinda cool." And my boyfriend said "I think its sexy". I guess its sexy like when a woman has a big mole on her face. I used to try all kinds of things that didnt work and then i gave up and sort of stopped thinking about it (sort of kind of). People who look at you might not be as shocked as you imagine, or even if they are, I seriously doubt theyre thinking about it too hard. Honestly there are guys that don't care. You'd be surprised - and the older guys get the less they will care (the good ones anyway). If you hold yourself confidently it is a huge turn-on, no matter what you look like. That can be hard to do when you dont feel comfortable with your appearace. I'd say, for now, go to a salon and ask about their beauty treatments. Other women have this upper lip hair but most of them probably have some secret treatment like Nair for facial hair. A salon where they do waxing and things like that would probably know how to take care of any kind of facial hair.

Since you're truly unhappy with the hair, its worth looking into alternatives for removal. (Even if you can't lessen the hair, it wont limit your life to work or die. And any man worth his salt will value you for the person you are. All women are beautiful, and that includes you. )

[sdrawkcaBgnioG]

Lesson here- shaving your upper lip is a BAD idea.



I was ALMOST in your situation. Black hair + pale skin = not good. Luckily, my mother scared me out of shaving it before I did.



It doesn't make the hair go away, it just grows back thicker. I suggest using Nair cuz that's what I do and it works pretty well. Or just pluck it out with tweezers. Sad thing is, it might be too late to save.

[fuzzysnowflake]

I just go and get my upper lip waxed every couple of weeks. You have to remember that everyone has it so you may think that people are looking at you but they mostly likely aren't. Just smile big and don't worry too much about how you feel.

[Beautiful]

well... ive never had this problem..ever. buttt....

as you put it; either a] be miserable or b] get the pill... i think you already made your decistion perfectly clear considering you put it like you did.

[Lena]

well... ive never had this problem..ever. buttt....

as you put it; either a] be miserable or b] get the pill... i think you already made your decistion perfectly clear considering you put it like you did.

[/b]

She was referring to cyanide pills. They kill you. DON'T do that, far from heaven.



Shaving doesn't make the hair grow back thicker, thats just a myth (basically the hair SEEMS like it, but actually isn't thicker. Ever cut bamboo canes?)



You can get your hair permanently removed by electrolysis - perhaps you could go to a local salon. Nair should be effective in the short term, though.



Take care,



Lena.

[Michie]

Yeah, electrolysis may do it permanently. But isn't that painful?



Now, I'm not sure of anything, but does anyone know if the birth control pill would help with this kinda situation? It affects the hormones...and perhaps this upper lip thing has to do with your hormone imbalance. Dunno. Just a guess. Either that the pill will balance the hormone(s) involved, or the birth control pill has the opposite effect and the hormones will be further imbalanced.



I was talking to my (new) general doctor when she suggested the birth control pill for me, to help reduce my acne...which apparently has to do with hormones. I'm not planning on taking it, though.

[Beautiful]

well... ive never had this problem..ever. buttt....

as you put it; either a] be miserable or b] get the pill... i think you already made your decistion perfectly clear considering you put it like you did.

[/b]

She was referring to cyanide pills. They kill you. DON'T do that, far from heaven.



Shaving doesn't make the hair grow back thicker, thats just a myth (basically the hair SEEMS like it, but actually isn't thicker. Ever cut bamboo canes?)



You can get your hair permanently removed by electrolysis - perhaps you could go to a local salon. Nair should be effective in the short term, though.



Take care,



Lena.

[/b][/quote]



oh...well then don't do that :-/ .

Theres always lazer hair removle?

[Lena]

Birth control can help to even out the hormone balance, yes.

[hategirl]

yes. i too am i lip shaver. it sucks. and now ihave tokeep doing it cuz i started. my best advise is use nair or wax. go get it waxed if you cant do it yourself. i highly doubt people are looking at your lip sweety. and as for the male species situation? FUCK THEM if they cant get past some fucking hair. besides there are guys all over the place that like women all natural. ive been told that men actualy dont likeit when a woman puts too much into her looks. bu it wont stop us from pileing on cover up and eyeshadows and shit, now will it?

but dont stress hun. im sure you will find someone who loves you for you, and not your hair-or lack there of-



best of luck!



cheers



ps. lazer and electrolosis are expensiveeeeeee.