I Can't Just "get Over It"

Have you experienced the pain of losing someone close to you? Do you grieve over the death of someone you knew? Here is a safe place to seek support.

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MattMan
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I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by MattMan »

Alright... I made a post about me being in a bad car accident on June 15th



I've lost two good friends and my girlfriend whom I loved as I have never loved anyone else.



I thought that we would get married after we turned 18...



Now, I wished that I had told her so many things, because she thought that I was an atheist,but really I wasn't. For awhile though I thought that I might be but I think that I was just pressuring myself to be like she was.



Now I'm being expected to go back to school and graduate with the rest of my peers, which I full well don't think that I'll be able to do.



Physically and mentally it's going to be a year before I'm going to be alright.



Emotionally... I think that this was the first girl I could see as a long-term commitment, and now it's over for the rest of my life and I don't know how I'm going to cope with it in the short term, because she was the first girl that I truly loved and felt loved by, and I'm not sure if any girl I meet in the future will mean as much to me as she did.
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by Kit »

Time. Time will heal. You just have to have faith and find all the good. :) You HAVE to move on or you will hurt yourself more. I know it's hard, but you have to do it. You're a strong person to of made it this far. You will find another - you just have to be willing to open your heart again. :) *hugs* Things will be fine. If you wanna talk, I'm around.



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Barbies are Evil
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by Barbies are Evil »

since I now can, i'm gonna move this to Grieving because, well, it belongs there. Like Sammi said give it time.......time doesn't heal all wounds, it leaves scabs. But at least the scabs are a tiny bit easier to deal with than open gaping wounds. Gross analogy, yes. True analogy, yes.
TJ[10:13 PM]: no not really..... it's all so.... like wow..... screw steps, you took a fuckin jet pack and strapped it on yourself and rocketed your way forward (thats my big bro)







And I'm going to extremes



Tomorrow I will change



And today won't mean a thing



I'm a bitch, I'm a tease



I'm a goddess on my knees



When you hurt, when you suffer



I'm your angel undercover



I've been numb, I'm revived



Can't say I'm not alive



You know I wouldn't want it any other way



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sbloemeke
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by sbloemeke »

Grieving is something that takes time to get over. However, the amount of time varies for each person. I find that if you have a good cry about it, instead of trying to be stong, you get over it a lot quicker. You also need to consistantly remind yourself that they are in a much better place. And give it some time. If neccassary, maybe see your guidence counselor about it, just to vent and get some soothing words.

I'm sorry this happened, but you can get over it. Just wait for a bit of time.
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MattMan
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by MattMan »

It has been 6 months now, I just looked at my calendar and realized "woah" I've been kind of grieving for 3 months, at first I felt fine, like it was alright, now I'm starting to get angry with the driver of the car that day for doing this, but more at myself, for getting in the car when I think now I had heard about his previous driving record (which isn't good at all) but there's no way to tell for sure, I know one of the victims of the car accident had likely been in the car with him before... I trusted her, and now not only is she dead, someone who trusted me is too. I can't sleep alot of the time at night because my conscience keeps me up. I feel that neither of us should have gotten in the car that day. And for the rest of my life, that date will be a horrid day to me.
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Barbies are Evil
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by Barbies are Evil »

you can't rewind to change the past and I know thats unspeakably hard to deal with.......all you can do is countiue to grieve, continue to post in here and continue on with your normal routinue..........im me if you need me.
TJ[10:13 PM]: no not really..... it's all so.... like wow..... screw steps, you took a fuckin jet pack and strapped it on yourself and rocketed your way forward (thats my big bro)







And I'm going to extremes



Tomorrow I will change



And today won't mean a thing



I'm a bitch, I'm a tease



I'm a goddess on my knees



When you hurt, when you suffer



I'm your angel undercover



I've been numb, I'm revived



Can't say I'm not alive



You know I wouldn't want it any other way



Meredith Brooks-Bitch
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MattMan
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by MattMan »

heh that's the thing... I'm not able to get back to my normal routine, I sleep way more than I used to, eat more than I used to, and spend WAAAY more time at home than I used to
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Barbies are Evil
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by Barbies are Evil »

give it time
TJ[10:13 PM]: no not really..... it's all so.... like wow..... screw steps, you took a fuckin jet pack and strapped it on yourself and rocketed your way forward (thats my big bro)







And I'm going to extremes



Tomorrow I will change



And today won't mean a thing



I'm a bitch, I'm a tease



I'm a goddess on my knees



When you hurt, when you suffer



I'm your angel undercover



I've been numb, I'm revived



Can't say I'm not alive



You know I wouldn't want it any other way



Meredith Brooks-Bitch
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Saren
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by Saren »

Truth being, sure, it may be seeming like you're never gonna get over it, and it's true. It'll always live with you. But a part of you will forgive any side of yourself that feels guilty for this incident. I know how hard it must be for you to have lost the person you cared about but it happened and you have to get on with it, as harsh as that sounds. Yes, it will be a day to always be on your mind but we all live through things we wish we hadn't done. Things that'll scar us until we leave this world. It's not up to us to push you where one side of you will be able to move on, it's up to you. You have to start doing something. I know it's hard but it isn't doing anything to blame yourself day afer day. Start living your life again. There are gonna be those days where you're down in the dumps, I'm not gonna lie, but it's life and without feeling, what else to show us we're alive?



Once you start getting on your feet again, not only will you be relaxing a bit more, but you'll still be keeping her and your friends at heart always. You don't need to let go, but do give it time to kick in. You'll never lose the memory of her.



Just know this is not your fault. It's natural to feel guilty and wanting to go back but you never knew it was gonna happen. Don't kick yourself for it all the time. We all make mistakes, like I said before.





Give it time. You'll see.
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iHEAVENn
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by iHEAVENn »

Matt like Erin said, you can't rewind time.

Even though you think you two shouldn't have been in that car that night, it doesn't change the fact that you were, and it doesn't make it your fault at all.

You'll probably hurt over this for the rest of your life, but don't let it become you. Don't let it get to the point where you drive yourself made thinking about the what ifs, and the whys constantly, because those do nothing good for you at all.
[CENTER]Man I wish you just left me alone.... Cause I was almost home.......

.:..::.?? Toga party anyone ??.::..:.

[/CENTER]



[CENTER]-:Logan Jacob:-

-:12-01-2007:-

-:6:21 a.m.:-

-:7 pounds 4 ounces:-

The most precious gift my husband has given to me

[/CENTER]



[CENTER]Image[/CENTER]
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MattMan
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by MattMan »

It has been so long, I almost forget the sound of her voice.... how long is normal to go without having someone close to you?
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iHEAVENn
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Re: I Can't Just "get Over It"

Post by iHEAVENn »

There's not a time limit on how long it takes to get back to normal life.. Cause life after something like that, is rarely normal again.

If you've almost forgot the sound of her voice, then you are moving on with your life, which is good. You need to focus on things that are happening now, not then. And you need to just find some way to forgive yourself, cause it seems like you haven't done that.
[CENTER]Man I wish you just left me alone.... Cause I was almost home.......

.:..::.?? Toga party anyone ??.::..:.

[/CENTER]



[CENTER]-:Logan Jacob:-

-:12-01-2007:-

-:6:21 a.m.:-

-:7 pounds 4 ounces:-

The most precious gift my husband has given to me

[/CENTER]



[CENTER]Image[/CENTER]
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