A Dangerous Question

[Sk8r_4_LiFe]

ive gotten a shitload of pms and ims saying u give great advice, i love you, ur the best, and i love them. Its great getting some feedback, but this time im the one in need of advice.



Last night, my girlfriend and I were joking about something enjoying something, and all of a sudden she said during my laugh, I have to ask you a serious question. I said shoot. She said, When you leave for college, do you want to end it? I was immediately taken back by the question, wondering if she wanted it to be over. She didn't but she feels that in college im going to be introduce to many new different people and I might connect. And I told her these reasons why I wouldnt connect and fall into a relationship with any other girl in college:

1) My college is military school, ill be worrying about pt and school work more than hot sex.

2) In the school its an all Boy-Butch school. and the girls ive seen that are in my class, are mostly beach rats from Long Island which I hate.

3) Im madly in love with Stephanie.



However she says, she doesnt want my answer for another 3 months, when I sorta settled into college.

I leave (its not far, the Bronx,) for college in 2 weeks, and yes im dorming but i get weekends off.



So what do you think, how can I prove to her that I want to stay with her? How do I know for sure she doesnt want to end it with me? Do you think I'm gonna do exactly as she says, and connect with someone at college?

[DominicanGurl87]

Well, Maybe she likes you too much and it's worried about losing you so she's asking you because she may not want to be hurt if you do go to college and find someone new - just explain to her all the love you have for her and if u love her as much as you say she doesn't have to worry about it because no matter how many pretty girls you might see over there only one interest you and got your heart so she has to understand that, but you should really talk to her about this and ask her if she's the one that wants to end it.

[Gostridah]

Well, I'm not you and I don't have much experience in this kind of stuff, but... hmm... well, if I had to guess, I'd say she doesn't really want to end it, she may be just scared that you aren't gonna see her as often and you're gonna meet a lot of new people, so there's a chance that the relationship could slowly die and she may not want that. Now, you make pretty good points and I think almost anyone would agree with you that you won't fall for someone else. The problem could be, SHE is gonna meet new people too, isn't she? And she isn't going to a military school (I'm guessing, correct me if I'm wrong), so it could be her that got hooked up with someone else, as bad as this sounds.



Of course, unless she's already got someone else, which is most likely not the case, she wouldn't want to think about this. But she may be the kind of person who prefers to end things before the trouble starts (you're the one who knows her so use your judgement).



So, in my opinion chances are that she's just afraid of having the relationship die down, and she wants you to answer once you've been in there for some time so you can think of it more objectively.



When you ask how you can prove you wanna stay with her, well, since fact is IMO that she thinks you can't think of it straight till you've been there, all you can do is reassure her that you love her, and wait until you're in college to give the definitive answer, and that's it (in other words, you'll have to bear with her for a while).



Well, for your second question I guess only you can answer that. I mean, at least I don't think I have enough info to even make an educated guess, and you know how things were going between you.



And, I'm pretty sure you won't connect with someone else, your argument (if it can be called so) is convincing for anyone, including yourself.



Now again I don't know what your relationship is like so I may well be far off. But at least I gave it my best shot...

[Bkm2004]

Originally posted by Sk8r_4_LiFe@Jul 29 2003, 01:39 PM



So what do you think, how can I prove to her that I want to stay with her? How do I know for sure she doesnt want to end it with me? Do you think I'm gonna do exactly as she says, and connect with someone at college?

Just tell her to give you a chance to prove it while you are in college and tell her that she will then see that she had nothing to worry about.

[She]

Personally, I think it's really sweet of her to ask. She's probably thinking that you might be thinking it and she doesn't want you to do something you don't want to. It sounds like she's just trying to make sure she doesn't make you do anything you don't wanna.



You guys are so sweet.

Did you get everything worked out with her parents?

[Sk8r_4_LiFe]

somewhat, according to her dad im still not supposed to date her - despite such a clean record i have with him

oh and shes not goin 2 college yet, shes gonna be a senior - shes a year younger.



i like ur point she, very nice.